Crosblog

Because life isn't worth living if I'm not incorrectly predicting predetermined events...

Women's Championship Match - Michelle McCool (C) vs. Mickie James
Who Should Win: After weeks of getting humiliated by McCool and friends, James is done if she doesn't take the title here.
Who Will Win: James
Will It Suck? While the buildup to this match has involved the most God-awful interviews professional wrestling has ever seen, McCool and James are actually pretty good wrestlers, so this shouldn't suck. But seriously, anyone who signs off on letting Michelle McCool within 100 yards of a live mic has no business writing a grocery list, let alone a television show.

ECW Title Match - Christian (C) vs. Ezekiel Jackson
Who Should Win: Christian. Jackson needs to prove he can handle a big match first.
Who Will Win: Christian. I assume this is Jackson's opportunity, and if he delivers, he could win the title later.
Will It Suck? No idea. Never seen Jackson in a singles match of any consequence, so maybe, but Christian should keep it watchable.

WWE Title Match - Sheamus (C) vs. Randy Orton
Who Should Win: I think Sheamus actually pinning Orton might actually push him over the top, and cement him as a main eventer.
Who Will Win: Orton
Will It Suck? No.

World Title Match - Undertaker (C) vs. Rey Misterio
Who Should Win: Taker.
Who Will Win: Taker.
Will It Suck? Not even a little bit.

30 Man Royal Rumble Match
Who Should Win: If they're hell-bent on doing Shawn Michaels-Undertaker II at Wrestlemania, then Michaels should win to make that match the main event.
Who Will Win: Michaels, last eliminating Triple H.
Will It Suck? No.

The Diesel Award - Given to the entrant who tosses the most wrestlers. I'd like to see Kane toss a bunch of people and become the all-time eliminations champ, but I think maybe Ted DiBiase will do something special to set up his eventual face turn.

The Backlund Award - Given to the man who lasts the longest. Since I think Michaels winning is a foregone conclusion, making him go 50+ minutes might be the only way to add drama to the event. If it's not Michaels, see Ted DiBiase, above, or CM Punk going an hour to show everyone how Straight Edge can work for you.

Cracked: Everyone at the hospital already hates Wes Welker.

But apparently John Malkovich will be playing the Vulture in Spider-Man 4.

Of course, after having both Venom and Sandman in 3, Vulture is kind of a drop-off. Does Dylan Baker finally become the Lizard?

John Edwards really is a tool.

It was fun reading about Edwards desperately trying to trade his endorsement for Obama's #2 spot. Fun, because he publicly claimed he had no interest in the Veep spot.

I'll admit - I never took a serious look at Edwards' policy positions or anything like that in deciding that I would sooner vote for Jimmy Fallon for President. I just looked and listened to the guy and thought - "What a douchebag. There is no way I'm voting for him."

Which, apparently, was the exactly correct thing to do.

I suppose everyone has to do some kind of decade retrospective, and ranking movies has the advantage of being easy to do, especially with the aid of my Flickchart rankings to help remind me what I've seen, and what sucked. A few movies were highly ranked enough to embarrass even someone of my lowbrow tastes, so this isn't in order or anything, but the following twenty movies are probably my favorites of the past decade.

Tip of the hat to Dov's list, which has several movies that I would definitely see if I were a lot more cultured than I am (although, I should note - that given that I like professional wrestling, I think I'm a lot more cultured than people would have any right to expect) and Dawn Summers, who I could easily go to the movies with without getting into a fight. (At least, we probably wouldn't fight about the movie.)

In alphabetical order.

1. Barbershop - One of the best experiences I've ever had in a movie theater was seeing this.
2. Batman Begins - The other one was a better movie, but this was an amazing reboot driven by Christian Bale far surpassing every other Batman performance ever done.
3. Borat - This was stupid and offensive. I haven't laughed so hard in years.
4. Casino Royale - Another great reboot. Daniel Craig is an awesome Bond: The Early Years.
5. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, & The Wardrobe - Yeah, I'm probably the only person who's going to put this on a "Best of the Decade" list - but I'd been looking forward to this movie for literally a couple of decades, and it held up despite my expectations.
6. The Dark Knight - Just a great movie. I still think it was a half hour too long and should have left options for Two-Face, but still a great movie.
7. Grindhouse - Bar none - the most fun I've ever had watching a movie in the theater.
8. The Incredibles - It's amazing how Pixar can do no wrong.
9. Iron Man - Did "Fun and over the top" just as well as Dark Knight did "creepy and disturbing.
10. Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring - I couldn't stand these books, so kudos to Peter Jackson for making the movies accessible enough to people who couldn't get through the source material.
11. Moulin Rouge - I like musicals. This was a good one.
12. The Notebook - I hate chick flicks. I loved this movie. That has to count for something.
13. Pan's Labyrinth - Best movie with subtitles I've seen...probably ever.
14. Pirates of the Caribeean: The Curse of the Black Pearl - This series got kind of stupid towards the end, but the start was outstanding.
15. Sin City - Another great experience watching this in the theaters.
16. Shoot 'em Up - Best. Stupid. Movie. Ever. The fact that you could have a debate about "Which was the best time a guy got killed with a carrot?" is enough to put this movie on the list.
17. Slumdog Millionaire - Token art film makes its appearance.
18. Spider-Man 2 - With all due respect to Iron Man and the Dark Knight, I still think this might be the best superhero movie ever.
19. Team America: World Police (2004) - "Matt. Damon."
20. The Wrestler - Let us all thank Mickey Rourke for spending years turning himself into a self-destructive wreck - enabling him to deliver one of the great performances of our time as self-destructive wreck Randy the Ram.

Certainly some of the gutsiest people in the world today are those taking the streets in Iran to protest President Wackypants and his band of rabid loons, who are perfectly capable of stage-managing mass calls for the execution of those asking Iran to truly join the world at large. Iran's government - who, by the way, have gone so far nuts they forced out a national soccer official for accidentally wishing the Israeli soccer federation a happy new year - have no interest in seriously listening to anything the protestors have to say. According to them, there is no legitimate dissent in their country, there is only what the West is drumming up because they fear the awesomeness that is President Wackypants.

The protesters, led by the guy that quite possibly most Iranians wanted to be their President, are under no illusions about what it is they're facing. There is, of course, an argument to be made that the West can best help by keeping their big yaps shut, but I don't agree. Everyone knows the West stands, at least nominally, with the protestors. The question is do we stand with them enough to make it inconvenient for the government to go Tiananmen Square on the protestors, or are we more interested in Iran pretending to cooperate with us on their nuclear program?

If someone wanted to make a stirring statement of support for Iran's protestors, I'm not sure this could be improved upon...

Iran's protestors..."are not 'insurgents' or 'terrorists' or 'The Enemy.' They are the revolution, the Minutemen, and their numbers will grow - and they will win."

It's not an original quote, but I trust the author of the original would appreciate it being reused in a good cause.